Why I really do love birthdays

Sometimes I like to pretend birthdays are just another day. And they are, really. But then my birthday comes along and I remember why I love birthdays.

Now, I may have tooted my own horn a little. I may have brought cupcakes in for my cohort like elementary school, and I may have wore an impossible-to-ignore grin today that signaled there was something special about today. Whether those things factored in or not, I have been made to feel so loved today on my birthday.

I've been on a high since yesterday. I'm not sure if it's all birthday related or if some of it is because it's the end of the week or what, but I have just been SO HAPPY today and yesterday. Mostly I am happy because I know that so many people care about me and are willing to indulge me with a hug today even if they aren't the hugging type. I also feel very, very content with my choice to move to Minneapolis. I already feel like I have my own community of people who care (even a little bit) about me. I think that, for one, makes all the difference.

So let me tell you some of the great things about my birthday:

• Waking up to warm cinnamon rolls baked by my roommate this morning, with one tiger-striped candle. 
• A package from my Mom, Dad and Jared with cookies and love
• Sarah making me a sign to hang on the door at the office so everyone knows it is indeed my birthday (if they weren't around for the first ten times I said it) and coming all the way from the MPC
• Hugs! Boy do I love hugs! (Especially Matthew's because he doesn't seem like a hugger)
• Kate coming over all the way from East Bank to eat a cupcake (oh, and wish me happy birthday!)
• My phone "blowing up" all day with facebook notifications, texts, and snapchats, including a picture of my brother and my dog Lizzie
• Knowing there are packages and letters on their way
• Taco Friday and conversing with some of the 2nd and 3rd years over lunch.
• Wearing my new Minnesota crew neck 
• Just hanging out with some of my cohort in the office without really trying to be productive
• Knowing that I'm going to get to eat a big fat cheeseburger for dinner for the first time since I moved to Minnesota
• Specific to this year: I no longer have to endure everyone's shocked looks when I tell them I am only 21 in a PhD program :P

So there you have it, some great things about my birthday. Birthdays, I know, don't always turn out quite so well, nor does everyone have the opportunity to celebrate their birthdays. For me, however, it always reminds that I am loved. People need that.

So, thank you.

And then it was fall...

All of a sudden, I knew it was Fall.

You never know when you have the last good day of Summer. You know it's coming quickly, but until that first day of Fall weather hits, you just have to try to enjoy the warm days as much as you can. Fall came to Minneapolis this week. It went from mid-70s to 50s just like that. Today at the department picnic I had a sweater and a jacket on and was still cold! It's funny, when it's 50 in March it's a heat wave; today....I was freezing. As much as I do enjoy fall, it's depressing to think that I won't be able to walk outside in a t-shirt again for 8 or 9 months. Cue my perpetual state of being cold.

Okay, okay. There are some  really great things about Fall. For instance, I am SO excited about apple cider. SO EXCITED. And apple crisp and apple sauce and apples. And even though you can make pumpkin flavored things any time of the year--pumpkin pie, pumpkin cookies, pumpkin cakes, and of course just pumpkins (which you cannot get anytime of the year). Leaves change and that's always really pretty until you realize that part's over too. Other good things about Fall? Football? Well, yeah I guess. Oh---new tv shows! The last season of Grey's starts in a couple weeks! And if we're considering it Fall from now on, My Birthday! MY BIRTHDAY IS THIS FRIDAY SEPTEMBER 19TH in case you were wondering :)

Onto other subjects... My second week of classes went well. I actually did 3 fun things this week. I have been telling people that I am only allowed one fun thing a week. For the past three weeks that has been dance on Wednesdays, so if I wanted to try dance another night I would have to skip the Wednesday gig. However, this week I went to trivia with Meghan and her friends on Tuesday, dance on Wednesday, and went to see The Fault in our Stars at a discount movie theater on Thursday---3 fun things! And I still managed to get my work done. Who said grad students can't have fun?! This week I probably shouldn't do that so I can do more than the minimum though :) Plus, I have to plan the prep stuff for our discussion sections for next week, so I have a couple more things.

Btw, my first discussion sections went pretty well. The first week was mostly just introductions. It was interesting to learn why everyone was taking the class (Intro Soc is a prerequisite for a lot of programs---sports management, nursing, need it for new MCAT section) and what they were most interested in learning about. The Monday section wasn't very talkative when we started discussion but I'm hoping it was just the first week trying to figure out how everyone fits in and what is expected of them. My Wednesday section was actually a little more talkative which I thought was strange because it is at 8am whereas my Monday section is at 10. TAing is a lot of work, especially planning for the discussion sections which I know I spend too much time on.

I also spend ALOT of time reading for theory. Marx and I have gotten pretty buddy buddy in the past two weeks ;) Tomorrow I'll spend a few hours at the theory reading group and then have to come home and watch a two hour lecture on Marx's Capital. Fun fun.  It's really never ending though. I read over the weekend for Tuesday's theory class, then have to respond to (or write) blog posts on Monday, then look over my notes Tues before class. Meanwhile, I will hopefully have started reading for Thursday before Tuesday's class so I can respond to (or write) blog posts on Wed and have a lively discussion on Thursday.

Things to look forward to for next week:

• I'm attending a dance performance as a requirement for my human rights class on Friday (MY BIRTHDAY). I'm interested to see how human rights themes are expressed through dance, so you can anticipate a discussion about that next week.
• Birthday Activities (whatever they may be) 
• My first payday

The trials of butternut squash and my first week of class

For those of you who have never cut or peeled a butternut squash....it's harder than it looks.

I sit here waiting for my newest kitchen creation to simmer away--butternut squash soup. My flatmate in Norway, Jera, used to make some kind of soup with sweet potatoes, carrots, squash, apples...a whole bunch of stuff! I've really wanted to try to make something similar so tonight is one of my experiments.

I was happy to see my hugging blog (or posting it on facebook perhaps) prompted 30+ page views on Friday. Today I wanted to do a quick recap and give my impressions of my first week of classes.

Well, by Friday I was exhauuusted. I'm hoping it was just the first week (mind you only a 4 day week) and that it will get easier (though I probably will always be tired).  Theory will probably be the first class to really kick my butt. My theory professor is actually quite fabulous and invited us to her apartment for a reading group today and it was very helpful. It's just dense material and takes a very, very long time to read. I should be used to that reading all that philosophy mumbo jumbo, right? Well..let's just say I need to make some improvements on the comprehension side of things. Anyway, right now we're making our way through Marx, who I am fond of actually, so it's going okay. We will see how well I am doing in stats tomorrow when we have our lab session and actually use the software. I don't think the class should be too difficult because I understand the concepts for the most part and it's really about getting the computer to do what you want it to. Tuesdays, which are my busy days), I have what we call prosem squeezed in between stats and theory. It's basically a mix between a how-to for professional sociologists and a Q&A therapy session. We also have to attend department workshops where we get to listen to someone else's research.

My last real class is a cross-disciplinary human rights class. It's on Friday afternoon right during my nap time, but I think it will be my favorite and most productive class. Because it's cross disciplinary we have a few people from the public policy school and one in the history department. There's only 6 or 7 of us, so it turns into insightful discussion where everyone can participate. Finally, I am participating in a journal editing seminar for credit, though it won't require as much time as an average class. The editor of the journal, Sociology of Education, is at the U and he gets a group of us together once a week to discuss his decision on a manuscript that's been submitted to the journal. I'm looking forward to learning more about what goes into submitting a manuscript for publication, what reviewers look for, etc.. By the way, there's also something called "The Society Pages" that is run at the University. It's a website that's aimed getting sociology to the public. There are a number of blogs on different topics, as well as something cool called "There's research on that!" where the writer discusses a topic that has been in the news recently and brings attention to studies that have been done on the subject. (For example, a section on the events in Ferguson includes links to research on policing black boys and the militarization of police. Check it out! http://thesocietypages.org/

Tomorrow I get to lead my first discussion section for the Intro to Sociology class I am TAing for. I'm pretty excited for it, but I know I'm going to be really nervous tomorrow morning. This week we're mainly just doing introductions and having a small discussion. I hope I'm not being overly optimistic about participation. I think back to my Elmira classes and sometimes for the professors it was like pulling teeth! I have two sections, one Monday and one Wednesday (at 8am!!!) so I'll get a chance to reevaluate after Monday's session.

Let me give you a quick picture of what it's like in the department and how things are situated. The first years all share an office on the 10th floor. The office is a pretty good size but there are 11 of us in there. Mind you, not everyone is there at the same time. On busy days maybe 6 or 7 would be in there together. It's not too difficult to focus if everyone is working, but often small conversations crop up and then it becomes near impossible. Usually people are in and out depending on what they have going on in the day. Sarah is hardly ever there because she has a research assistantship in the Population Center in a different building. Sociology takes up floors 9-11 and has some stuff on other floors. On 7, for example, there's the Teaching Resource Center. I take it there aren't usually many people in there so I've gone and read in there when I needed to focus. It also has a couch which is nice. Supposedly there's another study room on the 6th floor. The main office is on the 9th floor which is where my department mailbox is and the copy room. The lunch room is on the 10th floor right across from our office (both good and bad). We have a lot of our classes on the 11th floor in 1114. That's where all of the receptions tend to be held. It's gets a little old after a while, but there are only small, seminar sized classrooms in the social science tower. By the way, we do have a great view from that classroom on the 11th floor!

The U has a good system of tunnels and walkways which I am still figuring out. If I haven't said it before, one thing I've learned is to not go inside buildings unless you know where you're going or you're not in a hurry because you can get really turned around. The tunnel system is nice though and has signs so it's pretty easy to use. There is a tunnel from my building to the library and to the buildings that I TA in so really I never have to go outside if I don't want to. Hopefully I'll have it all figured out before I need to! To put it in perspective how small Elmira was and how big UMN is, at Elmira I could walk from one end of campus to the other in maybe 6 minutes. At the U it takes almost that long to walk across the bridge in between campuses.

Wow, this is getting long and my eyes are getting tired. One more thing. Last night I went to my first Major League Baseball game. Yes, I got to see a Twins game! It was a lot of fun and a perfect night for it. I ate some fried cheese curds (seems to be in replacement of mozzerella sticks here) and was happy. It was a pretty close game until right up to the last inning. The Twins didn't win but I did get to see a few home runs!

I hear a polar vortex is coming our way! Wish me luck!

P.S. For those of you who are curious, my roommate and I still get along splendidly :)

Never Underestimate the Value of Physical Contact

You should never underestimate the value of physical contact.

I remember a week or so into my stay in Norway I went to the doctor for something minor. At one point, the doctor lightly touched my arm.  She set off more than a feeling, almost an emotion that welled up inside. How could I have felt so deeply from the slightest human touch? I realized that I had barely had any physical contact in that week or so that I had been there. Whereas at home or school I would somewhat regularly sit closely to someone so that a leg or shoulder was touching, hug hello or goodbye, hold hands, etc. In Norway I had had very little, perhaps none of that. Thus, my "family" in Norway decided to start hugging whenever we greeted each other and definitely when we said goodbye for the night.

While I am certainly not an expert on the subject, there is research that supports a connection between well-being and physical touch. I certainly felt happier when we started hugging in Norway. Was that because I grew closer emotionally and intellectually as I spent more time with "the family?" Probably. Who knows how much influence the hugging actually had on my happiness. I do know that I really enjoy hugging and every time I have gone without touching another human for a time, I notice.

I've been lucky since I moved to Minneapolis that I've gotten to do a lot of hugging. About half my cohort seems to actively willing to hug, so that's a great sign since I'll be spending a lot of time with them. Another great way I've been satisfying my need for touch is through dance! That's what prompted this post actually; I was thinking about what a great time I had dancing last night and how great couple dancing is for a lot of reasons! One being the physical contact obviously---you have to have some sort of contact if you're going to be partners! Dance is also good exercise. I'm moving almost constantly for a good two hours. It also requires communication in more ways than one. You of course have to communicate with your body language---the leader has to indicate what move we're doing next, you have to tell the leader whether you understand and whether you're comfortable with it; often you end up communicating a lot with your eyes, whether you are trying to avoid eye contact, smiling, etc; you might also have a casual conversation while dancing.

Sorry for the quick dance-is-awesome tangent (you should probably all do it). The touch conversation also made me think of a time at the beginning of the school year last year when I implemented a three-hug-a-day quota for myself. It didn't last particularly long, but I kept my reminder written onmy whiteboard all year, so sometimes it did motivate me to squeeze (haha) an extra hug in.

Am I rambling yet? I'll be done soon, promise.

One last point of interest. As an aspiring professional sociologist, my discussion of physical contact made me wonder how other people experience physical contact, especially people in different social groups. Gender came to mind immediately, as it is often less acceptable for males to show physical closeness, especially with other males. I remember a conversation I had once discussing that perhaps male aggression and roughhousing is actually an acceptable manner in which males experience physical closeness.  Physical closeness (hugging, sitting so that you are touching someone) often indicates intimacy, as well. Thus in the heteronormative world that we live in in which we assume heterosexuality, a male and female sitting close enough to touch often leads us to believe they are in some kind of romantic or sexual relationship. Finally, I was also reminded of a cultural study about hugging, which found that people of Latin American countries, on average, hug many times a day (I don't remember the exact number but it was at least 20), Americans hug once and British people hug zero times (on average). So physical contact (in this case hugging) is also something that is culturally defined.

My point here is not necessarily to get anyone to add "3 hugs a day" or anything like that, but I do hope that my rant will encourage some of you to think more about how often you encounter human touch in a day, or a week, or a month. Like I said, I never knew how important it was in my life, until it was missing.

Perhaps my real motive in writing this was actually to get you all to hug me more ;)